Unacquainted English conversations in Korean

Active Listening
I practiced active listening on Tuesday by having a conversation with a friend. I want to engage in conversations more effectively, so today would be an excellent day. I went into the conversation with my friend feeling like there was no real need for me to listen actively, but it turned out that there were some things I could have done differently. My goal is not just to learn how to do it correctly but also to be aware of my own behavior to avoid making mistakes in the future.
I was able to identify two or three things that went well during our conversation: 1) when we were laughing together; 2) when I asked a question and then let my friend speak without interruption; 3) when she responded directly to what I said instead of going off on her tangent; 4) when she gave me specific examples rather than generalizations about what she thinks about something (Shigemitsu, p.100). These things helped me realize we were both active listening and engaging in a friendly dialogue rather than just arguing over who’s right and wrong. I also identified one thing that could have gone better: 1) when she interrupted me before I had finished speaking and when she didn’t give me any chance to express myself fully.
Me: Hi! Ann.
Friend: Hi, too long time
Me: I can’t believe it’s been so long since we talked. How have you been?
Friend: It’s good to hear from you, too! I’ve been busy with work, but I’m glad for the chance to catch up.
Me: So what have you been up to? I feel like we haven’t talked in ages.
Friend: Yeah, things have been pretty crazy here. The company has been making changes at the last minute, and keeping up has been challenging.
Me: I know how that feels. As an employee myself, I’ve been there before. You have to take one day at a time and try not to get overwhelmed by everything else around you.
Friend: That’s true! But sometimes significant changes need to be made—and sometimes they’re not always easy or evident until they happen. That’s why we as employees need to stay engaged with our employers: we can help them make better decisions when required, and we’ll benefit from it.
I also practiced active listening techniques with my boss on a Monday. I sat down and listened to what she had to say, then paraphrased her words back to her to get more information about what she was trying to say. It was a great exercise because it forced me to listen carefully and ask questions when necessary(Young et al., p.100). She appreciated my time with her and said it helped us communicate better. We are working on improving our relationship by speaking more openly and learning how each other’s words can be interpreted differently depending on who is saying them or why they are saying them.
My boss: Hi, how are you?
Me: Good. We’re working on a project together that I’m excited about, and you’ll be able to help me with it. I’ve been going over the materials and want to ensure we both understand each other’s questions so we can get started immediately.
My boss: Okay, great! Do you have any questions for me before we get started?
Me: Sure! I would like to know if we can meet in an hour to have time to go through all of this material together before our meeting tomorrow morning. That way, I know where everything is and can go over it again before our meeting.
My boss: That sounds great! I’ll see if I can work something out for tomorrow so we can meet at 10 am or 11 am instead of 8 am. Does that work for you?
Me: Yes, that’s perfect! Thank you!
I have learned much about active listening and how it can benefit me daily. I know that it is not always easy to listen actively, but I will continue to work on it throughout my life. Through the two conversations, I noticed that when people talk, they often go into what they think the listener wants to hear rather than what they want to say. This can be frustrating because it feels like you are being talked at rather than being listened to (Young et al., p.89). However, if you have practiced active listening, this will become easier as you get used to it and realize that your job is not just to hear what the other person says but also to understand how they feel about what they say.
Active listening has helped me understand the importance of listening, which has allowed me to communicate better with others and make friends with similar interests. This is especially important for me because I am from a small town where everyone knows everyone else’s business; therefore, listening well is vital for me to grow closer to others and form strong relationships with them. I plan to practice active listening more as time goes on so that I can become better at it and eventually perfect it.

Works Cited:
Young, Kathryn Sue, and Howard Paul Travis. Oral Communication: Skills, Choices, and Consequences. Waveland Press, 2017.
Shigemitsu, Yuka. “Being an active listener in unacquainted English conversations in Korean, Chinese and Japanese intercultural settings: A case study for thinking about teaching speaking skills.” Second Language Pragmatics and English Language Education in East Asia. Routledge, 2020. 95-116.